Demons On Fire

My demons are on fire,That's right, they're angry.The situation isn't dire,But lately I've been cranky. I can tell it's the depression,Just with a hint of frustration.I can feel the lingering aggression,As I await my salvation. My demons are on fire,They cause me to lash out.Of this I have no desire,But my mind is in a... Continue Reading →

I’m Fine

I'm fine, I say.I'm lying to myself,To get through the day.It's never heartfelt. Today was rough,I'm not excited for tomorrow.I've had just about enough,Of feeling this intense sorrow. I'm fine, I lie.I put on a fake smile,And avoid the urge to cry.What makes life worthwhile? Worth, something I lack.Self-loathing at it's peak.My brain's all out... Continue Reading →

Exhausted

I'm not tired, physically,I'm exhausted, mentally.I'm depressed, clinically.There's an imbalance, chemically. I've received a higher dosage,I'm really hoping it works.I can't control my emotions,I feel like a walking corpse. I can't enjoy anything,Not even my favorite activities.There's no form of self-healing,To combat this disability. I'm not disabled,I'm broken.I long to be stable,To regain my focus.... Continue Reading →

Nightmares

As the title implies,Asleep I cannot stay.For when I close my eyes,The demons come out to play. In a state of unconsciousness,I fear for my safety.I know this seems like nonsense,But the nightmares happen daily. As I awaken,Nightmares become reality.I feel forsaken,As I go on a crazy spree. Yes, I feel crazy.No, I can't control... Continue Reading →

The Diagnosis

Mom was schizophrenic.Dad was bipolar.What could I get from it?I found out as I got older. It started when I joined the military,Army National Guard.I don't believe I was wary,Of how things could get so hard. Alot of time had passed.I started noticing changes,To the point where I wore a mask,To hide all of the... Continue Reading →

Ineffective

My medication is wearing off,It's no longer protecting me.My demons begin to scoff,As I try to make a plea. They found a way through,The chemicals weren't strong enough.I'm lost without a clue,How am I supposed to rebuff? I thought they were working,Yet I find myself back at square one.I can see my demons smirking,As they... Continue Reading →

Apathy

Apathy is a powerful word,It comes with a powerful meaning.My wish for change goes unheard,As I can't feel myself bleeding. Depression, without the crying.Aggression, without the remorse.Recession, without the trying.Oppression, without the force. I feel nothing,I'm a zombie.I want to feel something,I'm not in my own body. I have all these worries,Yet I don't care.I... Continue Reading →

Mania

Let me describe being manic,It's one part of being bipolar.It's symptoms could be gigantic,As it's often hard to control her. It's almost the opposite of depression,It often just feels great.With this I have a confession,My shoulders carry alot of weight. Late nights become all-nighters,Great ideas spawn out of nowhere.In came my idea to be a... Continue Reading →

I’m Sorry

First things first, I'm okay.But I feel that I must write this,As I have some stuff to say.Perhaps then I'll feel bliss. I'm sorry, to those I've hurt.I didn't mean to, honest.When I'm angry, I tend to blurt.The things I say aren't so modest. I'm sorry, to those I've pushed away.I didn't mean to, truthfully.When... Continue Reading →

Welcome Back, Demon

Welcome back, demon,I've been expecting you.Now, what is your reason,For the things I'm going through? You should hold no power here,Yet you manage to find a way.I wish you'd just disappear,But you reside in my brain. You're selfish, you know that?You take and take, never give.You and I need to have a little chat,For myself... Continue Reading →

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